google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
