ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
