Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
And then he peed in my hair
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