So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
You left your phone here
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