I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
