peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
