So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
