Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
