I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Randomize
