Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
you inspire me to be a worse person
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
