He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
