Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(904): View more from Florida

We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese

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(817): View more from Texas

I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out

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(216): View more from Ohio

She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.

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(410): View more from Maryland

I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..

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(719): View more from Colorado

You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.

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(739): View more from

The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.

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(773): View more from Illinois

If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

you never keep up with shots anymore

(405): View more from Oklahoma

I'm trying to be more responsible these days

(918): View more from Oklahoma

you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot

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(208): View more from Idaho

You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...

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