How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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