Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Randomize
