i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
