Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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