Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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