I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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