You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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