We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
