I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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