Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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