you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Use "feeling words"
Yay
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
