I wannas sexs uuuuu
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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