Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize