Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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