my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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