Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
