so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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