I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
