i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
