At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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