I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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