It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
