I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
