The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
