Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
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