apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Small penises have feelings too.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
