I'm going to rape someone's good day.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
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