i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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