Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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