You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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