My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize