1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize
