are you still at the devil's house?
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize