this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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