I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
