ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
