whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
