Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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